Pet parents are very familiar with the term “Separation Anxiety” and want to know how to alleviate this behavioral problem. I’m happy to address the issue, but I need first to explain how pet parents can actually cause separation anxiety and that learning to avoid creating it is a lot easier than dealing with and trying to correct the symptoms of separation anxiety when it’s full-blown.
So, let’s examine how a pet parent creates separation anxiety. Here’s a perfect example. A schoolteacher is home for the entire summer vacation and decides to get a puppy. The schoolteacher, let’s use the name Alex, decides to get a puppy and name it Sam. Alex spends close to 24 hours a day with Sam, making sure the new puppy is well taken care of and has everything needed to start life in a new home. Alex even takes Sam with him when he goes out shopping, runs errands, and visits friends and family. Sounds good, but by the end of summer, when Alex has to return to teaching, Sam cannot handle being left alone. Sam is now barking, whining, chewing, peeing, and pooping in the house, salivating and stressed out. Poor Sam doesn’t even want to eat. Sam is not a bad puppy; he’s a puppy that has never been by himself for a single day in his young life.
The point is Alex needs “Alex time,” and Sam needs “Sam time.” Then, Alex and Sam spend time together. If you think this sounds ridiculous, I assure you that I talk to pet parents about this all the time. We all do the same thing. We get a puppy and want to spend as much time as possible with it, but the puppy needs to be separated from the pet parent, even if it’s only for ten to fifteen minutes at a time initially. Then, gradually increase the time.
You may not be going to work in the next few days, but you will need personal time, meaning avoid taking the puppy with you to the bathroom to shower, make a phone call, or work on the computer. Give the puppy something he will be interested in and leave him in a crate, playard or confinement. Deliberately leave the puppy, go into another room, and work up to going outside for short intervals. Then, use the same routine when leaving the house, like picking up your keys, taking a bag, or putting on shoes. Those triggers will set off barking or other unwanted behaviors in the future when done without a dress rehearsal. Put those triggers outside or in your car and return to the house. Then leave a little bit later. Try using a different door. Try pulling your car out of the garage and then use the front door instead of the door to the garage.
Your puppy already has separation anxiety. What now? Follow the same routine. At first, leave the puppy alone for five to ten minutes with a new and interesting chew or toy. Build up the time and start by going into another room, then outside.
Many rescued dogs will exhibit separation anxiety even if they don’t show affection or connection to you, the pet parent. I know that’s difficult for us to wrap our brains around, but your new dog still feels comfortable and secure knowing you’re home, and he is not being abandoned. Affection and connection come with trust. It takes time, patience, and “puppy steps” to achieve, as does alleviating “separation anxiety” with an already stressed-out dog.
Suppose you have an adult dog that exhibits any form of separation anxiety, meaning barking, whining, chewing, destruction, urinating, defecating, or even vomiting when you leave him alone in the house. In that case, it’s important to know that demonstrating any of those behaviors most commonly occurs within the first half-hour you are gone. If the separation anxiety is not extreme destruction, for example, but urination or barking, try building up the time you separate from your dog, starting with only ten minutes. Go outside, change the routine, don’t make a big deal about it, just go! First, leave the triggers…keys, handbag, and go. Come back in as nonchalantly as you left. Try offering a new chew or toy and remove it after the exercise. Rotate a few new chews and store them in freezer bags in the freezer.
In cases of extreme destruction, a crate or playard might be the answer. However, to ensure your dog is crate-friendly, additional “dress rehearsals” inside the house before venturing out are also required.
If your puppy is in a crate, it sometimes helps to move the crate to another part of the room or a different room. The heartbeat of the house, usually the kitchen, is the best place, and being close to the door you use for house training is also helpful. A wire crate is preferred over a kennel cab (plastic crate) because the puppy can see you better, you can see the puppy better, has better ventilation, and is easier to clean. If the crate is in the corner of the room, try moving it away from the wall. 
If you’re using a confined area of the house, make sure it’s not too large, as smaller spaces give the puppy more comfort and security. Additionally, you can’t housebreak well in large areas where the puppy can urinate on one side of the room and move away to the other.
A laundry room or room tucked away in the back of the house is usually too isolated and will cause added stress to the puppy.
I do not suggest or condone letting the puppy cry for extended periods, which causes unnecessary stress. The puppy should only be left for short intervals until a comfort level is reached. Modifying unwanted behavior is a slow process. Remember… take puppy steps.
