CAN YOUR PUPPY BE TOO FRIENDLY?

Though we cannot always ascribe human traits to our pups, it’s often easier to use human traits as a comparison to understand canine behavior.

You may remember having a friend or classmate who needed more attention than anyone else. In humans, attention-seeking behavior may originate from envy, lack of confidence, boredom, or loneliness. Attention-seeking behavior that reaps desired results can manifest into manipulative behavior. A “manipulative person” has a negative connotation attached to the title. There are ulterior motives and hidden agendas associated with manipulative human behavior.

Canine manipulative or attention-seeking behavior is not premeditated or insincere but is not generally labeled as problematic. Over time, the pet parent has learned to accept and live with it. The truth is, pet parents usually perceive a pup’s attention-getting behavior as smart, cute, and, in some way, reward-worthy. However, the reward is not always a treat. The reward is giving the puppy the attention it was seeking in the first place. Picking up and cuddling a small dog or too frequently fulfilling belly rub requests validate the constant need for attention.

A puppy that jumps on your leg will be rewarded by the pet parent, who, in turn, pays attention to the puppy verbally and physically. A high-pitched whiney voice and petting are reward enough. This indulgent reinforcement is validating, encouraging, and conditioning your puppy to repeat this soon-to-be,  not-so-cute action of jumping. A dog that barks incessantly until you relent and give in to whatever your puppy wants is demonstrating manipulative attention-seeking behavior. To be clear, manipulating simply means influencing the behavior of others. Canine manipulation is, by and large, benign. A manipulative person generally lacks principles and values.

So you bring home a new adorable puppy and can’t wait to show him off to the neighbors, friends, and family. You start taking him everywhere you go and invite everyone you know to come to visit and see your new puppy. It sounds perfectly normal—everyone does it. Socializing a puppy will help prevent aggressive behavior toward people in the future. But can your puppy be over-socialized? The answer is yes. Absolutely!

There will be a point when your friendly puppy, who runs to the first person they see, jumping and rolling over for belly rubs, stops being cute and evolves into problematic. An over-socialized puppy will create uncomfortable and sometimes embarrassing situations for their pet parents when in a public setting. Trying to control a puppy who is always allowed to “say hello” to everyone will not be possible in the stages that follow puppyhood.

For a puppy to grow into a socially graceful adult dog, he must learn to demonstrate self-control in social situations. Allowing your puppy to pull on the leash with you in tow to greet a neighbor down the block or across the street is the beginning of over-socializing. The proper training for this “let’s meet the new neighbor” is to have your puppy sit and wait till the neighbor approaches your puppy. The second part of that vital neighborly lesson would be allowing your puppy to be pet only while he remains sitting. The third part is telling your neighbor to pet your puppy under the muzzle and front of his neck, not on his head.

I have also become aware that puppies who spend the majority of their time with family members or are oversocialized outside of the household have an increased amount of separation anxiety. These puppies have a difficult time being alone and cannot settle down to play by themselves or be satisfied with a chew or toy, even if pet parents are nearby.

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