Have you ever brought your car in for service to the dealership because it makes a strange scraping, thumping noise, or squeaking sound? You think it’s probably the brakes and hope it’s not something worse, but all you see are dollar signs flashing in front of your eyes. Then, as soon as you get to the service department, the noise stops. You try to explain and replicate what you’ve heard, but even a test drive doesn’t yield a single unusual sound.
If you haven’t experienced a similar scenario with your family canine, imagine how a pet parent feels when their dog shows none of the disturbing behaviors they tell me about, when I meet them and their dog for the first time.
Quite often, pet parents will call in advance of my consultation and evaluation visit and ask if I want them to put their dog in a crate or playard, or leave their dog outside in the backyard. Occasionally, the pet parents will have a leash on their dog before opening the door.
A lot of the time, if there is no prior texting or call from the pet parent before my arrival, the pet parent will hold the dog by the collar to keep it from running out the door or jumping on me as they open the door.
This is due to experiencing their dog lunging, jumping, barking, and even nipping at anyone who enters their home. Most of the time, the pet parent is surprised to see their dog does not react the way they expected, as I come into their home for our initial meeting.
So why do some people exude an aura that dogs are instinctively drawn to? What makes me different from someone else coming into a home for the first time? What makes me different from the pet parents I came to meet? What makes dogs drawn to me in a trusting, respectful, and affectionate way?
If you’re thinking, it’s because they see me as the Alpha, you are incorrect. In the wild, that would be true because the Alpha has earned its role by providing resources and protection, as well as leadership.
Family dogs are receptive to body language, soft voices, and humans who make them feel safe. I emit confidence, but I am not threatening. My demeanor is that of someone who spends a lot of time with dogs.
From the moment I walk through the door, I naturally convey a positive energy of trust and respect through my voice and body language. I do not fear the dog, and the dog does not fear me.
People who have a deep, natural understanding of animal behavior instinctively know what signals a dog is showing and provide what is essential to that dog, to foster trust and respect. I love that the dogs I am so anxious to meet for the first time are so happy to meet me as well.
How often have you heard that dogs do not like it if you look them in the eyes? How often have you heard recently, through positive training, which I do not totally agree with (but that is another subject), to turn away from a dog instead of looking at them? I think the eyes say everything. I LOVE DOGS! And I choose to believe that they know I love them.
But love is not enough and will not earn you the respect you need to work with a dog. Pet parents love their canine family members, but don’t understand how to gain respect along with love.
Consistency in energy—steady calmness, no sudden moves, no forced interaction. Predictability builds trust. Dogs gravitate to humans that they instinctively smell of strength but not threatening, safe but not submissive, and friendly but not forceful.
Dogs rely on their instincts, something humans do not often do. In fact, only humans will make an informed decision to go against their instincts.
